Disciple Leadership

A Field Guide for the Hero’s Journey:

Do I feel that I need a grand, detailed plan before being able to move forward? Sometimes I do. I do not like to fail and so I sometimes feel the desire to know what the end result should be deter me from starting in and experimenting. One of the best examples of this characteristic is the contrast between me and my husband in the kitchen. He enjoys mixing and substituting ingredients at pleasure, designing innovative and original recipes, and he’s okay if things don’t work out because he will just tweak a few things next time. I, on the other hand, like to explore and modify but only within safe boundaries I’ve set. I like to search things out, cut the recipe in half to save ingredients if I’m trying something new, and I always have budget in mind. This contrast has helped me to learn a very real-world balance between going all-out and failing more times than necessary, wasting resources, time, and energy and holding back from getting started until I have the answer spelled out. Sometimes the joy is in the learning and not the end result.
The question about ethical guardrails really stood out to me. It is very similar in nature to the concepts of health and geneology that I’ve been looking into lately. Yesterday, after much discussion and encouragement from Blake, I told him that I was ready to never eat sugar with him again. We had talked about it before but my motivation was always wrong. I wasn’t personally driven and motivated; the timing just wasn’t right. Once I learned about health and fertility I felt absolutely ready, of my own free will and choice, to clean up my diet and make ANY sacrifice necessary. Blake was thrilled when we spoke about it, but I realized how different I felt about it because it felt like my idea and I was taking ownership. The same principle applies with family history work. It has always been discussed and of course I knew it was important, but until this semester…with the right timing…I never felt a personal draw to participate. Now I feel passionate and grateful and I know that timing and motivation really can make all the difference. I want to understand the underlying principles of integrity and choose to set ethical guardrails because I want to, not just because it seems like someone else said it was a good idea, or even if I understand it logically. I want to be intrinsically motivated so that I can stick to my morals come what may.


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